Friday, January 16, 2015

rejection... please...



Rejected again… and again and again… and again…

Just how in the hell I salvaged the last attempt of the evening from turning into a disasterfull failure of a night… I do not know… was it consistency or playing the odds… I was consistently failing… and the odds were stacked too high against me… I almost got slapped by one woman… but I just didn’t give a damn… Cris and the bartender looked on in amazement and amusement as I flirted with one woman after another and threw out my best Tom Selleck – I went from one woman who rejected me  straight to her friend sitting  next to her… and moved right on down to the next woman at the bar… may be she was curious… but she called me on my bullshit and I called her out on hers…

Some women would call me a player – but I don’t really know what that is… I don’t really have much game… but I don’t care anymore – or I care much less than I did before… I get rejected all the time – but I know it is only because I put myself out there so much… I don’t care about the rejection and I really didn’t care last night if I picked up a woman or not… but it turned into a bit of a joke between Cris, the bartender and myself…  I felt a little bad waking her up early this morning to get her out of my hotel room… after working so damn hard to get her there in the first place… not really…

Oh… Cris ended up with two nice looking woman  - who rejected my advances… but the bartender was the big winner last night… he went home two fists full of cash!
 artwork
Dmitry Shorin

Wednesday, January 7, 2015

enlightenment

Have I reached enlightenment?

Yes.

I am convinced of it - you will think dear reader that Dash Deringer is lost once more in self -delusions.. That is fine with me - because... wait for it... I don’t care... and it is this lack of caring... this deficiency of concern, of worry, of sympathy for the world and the sheep that fill it... that is... very... very... fucking liberating...

It has been happening for quite a long time now... little by little I began to care less and less until finally I just let go... stopped worrying about the things I have no control over and the people whose opinions mean absolutely nothing to me and began acting and moving with the complete and total intent of making myself happy... now, I have said before and have always told people that I don’t care what others think of me and that one should only worry about one’s own happiness... but I never truly let it all go... until now... I don’t care about your feelings and I don’t want to make your problems mine... in fact I don’t want to know them... I don’t care about your beliefs... your dreams... your hopes and your fears... I don’t give a damn about your politics your religion, and where you stand on issues like faggots, feminism, war... I don’t give two shit’s about your views on left or right - conservative liberal nazi zionist ufo Buddhist new age nationalist socialist fruitcake shit you believe in... I have my own insanity to fill my time with... but  - my time... chasing my dreams, pursuing my goals and running after the things that fulfill my life... and not stopping to care about all the bullshit around me... is freedom... I know what is bullshit the media is trying to sell... it’s all around me... I can look into some one’s eye and tell they have been zombiefide... and are blind to the truth... and I don’t care... I truly and sincerely don’t give a fuck anymore.... and I feel great!!! I’m happy... I haven’t been happy like this since I was a child on Christmas... “live and love like there is no tomorrow” I always say - but fuck!!!! truly do it and not give a damn... if you live like there is no tomorrow... you’re going to chase after the moment... and hold onto that moment for as long as you can... without worries... and you will be happy...

Hold on there my little gypsy samurai’s... I don’t go out of my way to hurt anyone’s feeling... I don’t intentionally set out to piss people off... but I have stopped caring whether the woman I am with has an orgasm or not... I fuck her like it was my last fuck on earth and worry about me... they seem to come back for more... so I will keep acting in this way... Americans are turning into pussies... the western world is following close behind... but those of us who have stumbled upon this little secret of happiness... might be able to save the rest of the world - if we gave a fuck enough too... but I don’t... it would get in the way of my happiness-devil-may-care-vagina conquering-money-making-magic... I am happy!!! so far only my mothers tears have been able to quilt me into giving a fuck... other than that... stop worrying so much and live your life... your way...

Life’s too short for bullshit... build something... write something... paint something... create something and stop worrying and complaining... and mind your own fucking business...